My Heart is a Chainsaw

My Heart is a Chainsaw by Stephen Graham Jones took me in more than a book has in a long time.

I've been wanting to read a book by the author for a while now, and I've particularly heard a lot about Only the Good Indians over the past couple of years. I decided to take My Heart is a Chainsaw out from my library, and I'm so glad I did.

Jade is obsessed with 80s slashers. I’ve never been into slashers (I can handle some gore in books but not so much on screen) so I didn’t understand half her references and yet she made me want to watch them all. Her soliloquies on final girls and all of the other tropes and patterns that these movies follow and what they tell us about life pulled me in.

I spent the whole book asking: is this book actually a slasher or just a book about a girl who loves slashers so much she’s manifesting one? And it's not only that she loves these films, but that she’s deeply obsessed with them. She's desperate to occupy a space outside of her own reality, which is riddled with trauma. The author put me into Jade’s head so well—I also desperately wanted to stay inside her imagination and not face the memory of what happened to her. 

The action didn’t pick up until the very end but I prefer a slow-moving book, so I didn’t mind. Personally, the action towards the end of the book was actually my least favourite part about it. Her relationships with her history teacher (we get to read her history papers, which are all about slasher films) and the town’s sheriff are very endearing, albeit complex, and the lore of the small town is so rich. I loved following Jade around town as she was lost in her twisty imagination, both strange and mundane things happening around her.

This is a trilogy, so I will likely read the other books at some point. The book was a lot to handle emotionally, and I also kind of just want to sit with how much I loved it without the risk that the next two won't be the same, so I think I'll take some time before I do. If you like young women being their freaky selves, slow-burn horror, and sharp humour, I would definitely recommend giving it a read.